And Just for a Minute, I Was Sure I Was Laura Llew
I went to court today. (I lost, for those of you into mere mundanities, if over $1,000 can reasonably be called a mundanity.) But oh! the people I saw!
It was in Hillsborough, the county seat for Orange County, where I used to live, (I live in Durham County now) which unlike Chapel Hill is amazingly like the rest of North Carolina. I got the courtroom very early, since I had no idea where it was and desperately wanted to be on time -- I had nightmares the night before of bench warrants and angry bailiffs and the Orange County Correctional Facility. I sat off to a corner by myself and amused myself quietly by listening to my prosecutors prepare their case.
So of course, Bubba and Tommy Joe in the requisite camoflage jacket, overalls and John Deere mesh caps (yes, I thought about stealing them, but only cause they bitched for about ten minutes that they couldn't wear them inside) sat down right in front of me.
To my great unhappiness, I never learned what their case was about, other than "just a feeble attempt at extorsion. They ain't got no proof. No Goddammed Proof." They talked very loudly, just short of a bellow, while the rest of us just whispered in the presence of Justice. They mocked their accusers loudly and then planned their revenge. "I'm gonna set up a pig sty right next t'thuh property line and they ain't nothing they can do, so long as I don't use them pigs for profits." "That's right, Bubba, long as it's on agricultural/residential land." "Yeah it is.They rezoned roundbout the time Ella passed on." "Yeah, yeah. I remeber to that now." And how he was going to rebuild some car engine that rattles windows and leave it on for hours.
Mine was the first trial, alas, and was done and over in 2 minutes. Judge: "Your defence, son?" Me: "Umm. I don't have one. I owe the..." Judge: "Judgement for planitiff. Next." I promptly worked out a repayment schedule with the lawyer and went home for a nap, so I never heard the trial of Bubba and Tommy Joe, and man! I am kicking myself. You can't buy entertainment like that.
"But if they don;t see the quality then it is apparent that you're going to have to change or you're going to have to go with girls. You'd be better off..."
I hate boys. I thought I met a really, really nice one recently, but it was All Lies. I got ditched two nights in a row and then he didn't call the night before my trial when I really needed him to. I'm thinking of joining a charterhouse. In the mean time, I'll satisfy myself by being bitchy to Brian, the boy whereof I speak.
And quickly, as I'm late back to work...
I finished Thus Was Adonis Murdered (great!) and am now almost done with The Highest Science. I start The House of Mirth tonight.
Dr Who of the Day: Frontios.
I don't know what's up with my internet connection. I hope it gets to working soon.