Friday, October 03, 2003

All Dancing. All Singing. All Naked.

*in a deep cheesey voice, as one selling beef products* Round these parts, that's how we celebrate this kind of day. Dancin'. Singin'. Cavortin' sans clothes.
Cause today is a special day. A joyous day.
That's right, it's a porn star's birthday. And not just any porn star, a Laura Llew star.
Fetch your garters, Grandma. They's partyin' to be done!

Reasons I thought about Laura Llew today:

1) For no easily discernible cause, there was a plastic bottle of Unpleasantly Flavoured Water in our cooler at work today. I have not seen any Unpleasantly Flavoured Water since the Unfortunate Event last year.

2) I saw Llew's new sweetums at work today, when he was in with Darren Jesse. Unfortunately, before I could get a fat man to sit on him til by interogation was over, they had left the store.

3) In a discussion of PBR, I told (again) the store of Mrs. Llew singing the PBR song in church to great mirth.

4) I was sorely disappointed that she wasn't at Elmo's the other day, cause she would have beat Alicia to the punch with the French Comment. Also, she would have laughed at least as much as me.

And none of this is particularly birthday-centric. This is a pretty typical "Thinking of Laura" day.

Oh well. Go have a threesome in her honor, yo. Take some chocolate with ye.

*14 Days till I see *my* boy.

Wednesday, October 01, 2003

Baggy t-shirt - check. Ill-fitting jeans, check. Air of supreme homosexual rowr-ness - um, check-ish.*

I certainly am not going to write an entire post about how Neil** actually spoke to me tonight at work. Oh no.
That would be silly.

*The title is from a most amusing post by Markelby. You can read it here.

**You have to scroll down a bit. But the pic's there.

Tuesday, September 30, 2003

Top Three Reasons to avoid my mother...

I just called my parents to see if they have a box of my winter coats (including my leather car coat, my perfect suede -- oh how I love suede -- jacket and ALL my scarves, hats and gloves).

Her first response: You've put on far too much weight to wear any of those.
Me: Since when?*
Her second response: Anyway, there'll all too expensive. You don't need such extravangances.
Me: There'll all paid for already. I might as well use them. And they're all cute.
Her third response: Well, we put them underneath the house where we put the last batch.
Me: *amost dumbstricken, after they let rot $600 of my clothes last time*
You mean the stuff that got covered in mildew and in rat crap?
My Mother: Yes. And don't use profanities.
Me: !!!!!

The conversation lasted about 15 more seconds.
Won't you all join me in the "Get Jay A Winter Coat Project"?

*Am I fat? I don't think I'm fat. Have I become a blimp and not been aware of it? Aaaa! My parents always turn me into a Neurotic mess.

I've just spent a long time toying with the review site (new links! new reviews!) and updating the music listing here, so I'm not very compelled to write a lot right now.
It's been an oddish day and a half with some ups and downs. Feather Boa glimpsed two old Dames at lunch. A band I reviewed linked their review. Dr Who is coming back. So is Belle and Sebastian. I got a free Jeff Buckley CD. The House piano was tuned today. We won at trivia. I went (attempted) to go shopping with Alicia. In which this was overheard:

Me: *seeing very cute boy with an even cuter scarf* Why don't I have friends
who look like that?!
Alicia: *who has a better view of his upturned lapels and effetely double-tied
scarf* What, French?
Me: *laughs for three minutes*

Conversely, the whole shopping deal didn't really pan out.
I miss my Kitty. A lot. Much more than I ever expected. He was there during my bad spell last year with no job, money or friends.
I also miss my boy. (17 Days and counting til I go up to see him...)
I am very disheartened by applying to Grad School. I do not want to go to Ohio University or the University of Alabama. (But then again, I scorned my present job when I was applying and it turned out to be pretty cool.)
I've been snubbed by cute gay boys TWICE in three days. I don't know why this bugs me, but it does.
I went to a truly awful Lesbian party.

Ah well.
I train somebody tonight as an On-Air DJ.

This post brought to you by: Jeff Buckley, Live at Sin-E
Current read: Doctor Who -- Option Lock
Word of the Day: Puss. As in face.
Carl at Work: Man, you should bottle these things and sell them under
your own name.
Me: With my smiling puss on every damn bottle!
I mean it when I Say I'm Good...

chocolate condom

You Are A Chocolate Flavored Condom!

Addictive and totally decadent.

People are passionate about you - driven wild by your every move.

You are often an object of desire, although you're usually too much to handle!

What Flavor Condom Are *You*?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

perfect lay

You Are a Perfect Lay!

All sorts of guys long to hook up with you, but your standards are set high.

You don't just give it up to anyone, but when you do...they can't get enough of you!

You have a knack for pleasing and receiving, and sex with you is never boring.

Only problem is ~ they all seem to be falling in love with you...

What Kind of Lay Are You?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

Oddly enough, I found both of these in a link from Laura's Blog, proving -- Once Again -- LAURA LLEW IS A PORN STAR.

That is all.