Friday, April 25, 2003

You Probably Heard Me Cum From There

My cross between sex and drugs returns after a fucking year:
Dr Who books return to US.
If you missed my radio show, You Are A Sucker!

It was officially my best ever. It made you shake your big ole butt, lie back in the summer sun, rock like a girly punk and croon along softly at 3 am in the rain.
I'm so posting the flowsheet when I get it back.
Course that takes THREE MONTHS!

Thursday, April 24, 2003

I Forgot

So Laura is Officially the funniest person I know. She claims to have been very tired whilst watching Queer as Folk and I believe it. The distinctly graphic sex scenes apparently didn't phase her (yeah, like she's the only girl in the world who likes watching Gay Porno) but she made no real mention of them. What did she comment on, you may well ask:

Laura *watches the hott 15 year old try to score with an older guy*: Why doesn't he try to get boys his own age? He'll spend the rest of his life trying to do that.

Jay: *says nothing for 7 minutes because he's laughing so hard he gets oxygen starvation* He he... *gasp* He he... Oh wait. There was a Dr Who reference just then.

PS: Laura, the next episode, he gives a boy a handjob at school.

The only thing I don't like about that show is how much sex is going on. Specifically, these guys can't take a step without falling into some guy's mouth. Me, I can't pay people to get it. Maybe the blind thing will evince the odd pity fuck.

Hint, Hint

How to tell I'm not really listening.

Brian: So... I saw you at the show the other night.

Jay: Fine. How are you?

Brian: You really like them, right?

Jay: Oh, it was my friend Laura.

Brian: I SAID: You like them, right?

Jay: *very sweetly* You obviously have no sense of discretion or self-preservation or you'd have walked away by now.

Brian: *backs off slowly*

Yeah. I don't like being ditched AT ALL, yo.

PS: I made one tiny change to the site that cracks me up. Can you spot it?
Buy Some Violets, Guv?

I'm selling flowers on the corner of Rosemary and Cameron* because that's the traditional occupation of Blind People.
My poor eyes were burned out on my innocent perusal of Ms Laura Llew's site. Apparently, she went around taking pictures of some fat ugly boy and is claiming it's me. Bah! He DOES have some cute boots, though.

*No, this intersection technically doesn't exist since the roads run parallel, but it is mentioned in a cute Ben Folds Five song ("Kate" from Whatever and Ever Amen) so I'm going there.

Wednesday, April 23, 2003

Dammit, Yo.

SOMEONE had better confess this Miss Crush nonsense. It's driving me crazy. And not the cute, mumbles to self and rambles to others crazy, but the vicious sword weilding kind.
Nothing Much

Umm, Laura came to see the Delgadoes. They (both) rocked. We shamed a waiter. We ate pizza at Peppers. We laughed at Damooo.
Um, I'll talk about all this later, when I actually have a computer that works.
Also, I bought a really keen Delgadoes Baseball Tee.
Further, I bought Stars' (Star's? I'm not sure on this point) album Nightmusic, which contains my favourite ever cover of This Charming Man.
I'm illegally using the boss' (I am sure about that one) computer. Again. Which is a very bad idea. See here if you didn't get this poignant Sinister post vingette.
Okay. Work computer is funk-some. As opposed to funky. Go here instead: